Wait….What’s Mine Is Theirs…..???

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Somehow.. that doesn’t sound right.

Good. You agree. Thank you.

I always thought your kids are in a way… obligated to get into your stuff and claim it as theirs.

Ok, so I was semi- cool with that but I had 4 kids!!!! You know I had to lock that down to a no trespass zone at times.

As the years went by, I assumed my children understood that Mom is allowed to own things she doesn’t have to share. Hah! I could believe that fairy tale with all my heart as long as I wanted….. and as long as I didn’t go looking for item x that one of my darling angels “borrowed” from me…never to be seen again.

Do you know that includes a towel here and there for when my oldest one was working on his vehicles and just had to grab a couple of my towels…..and do you think my son looked for the oldest ones? Raggedy ones? No!

Why, you ask, did he need towels?

I stopped asking by that time.

When certain kitchen items (my favorite wok, a particular iron skillet, ceramic bowls) vanished into thin air…

Then came the day when I got a dog. By that time I had a few medical issues and my daughter-in-law took care if me. One day shortly after we combined homes for practical use, I walked into her kitchen and saw MY cast iron skillet, wok, and can opener.

The dog didn’t disappear. He’s still with me.

Robin.

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its a blog …ok?

And so we begin.

……..(hour later…)

Ok. I spoke with an ex husband of mine the other day …[the one who our children are still mad at me for over our divorce] (another blog down the road), and we discussed our daughter….again. We have two of them.

This one is the daughter who forgets she is a girl. I’m not talking about being without properly applied make-up and lightly done but just right, not even saying in any way that her style of dress is that which could confuse a person to guess what sex she was. No. I’m talking about this nicely made up beautiful young woman of twenty-eight who dresses appropriately kind of acts like a …well… tom-boy still. She still will get into skirmishes.

Of course her dad is in the support lane, making sure he doesn’t get any of that [OMG I’m so mad at you mom] angry stuff leftover from childhood days (he and I divorced 14 1/2 yrs ago).  Its time to act adult-like, right? Sort of how some of her friends do? Maybe its not for her….. yet.

In any case, the ex is not to be counted on for support in this area. He will remain loved to a fault, huggable and very glad he is not me.

Hmm.


Robin

 

 

 

There’s Loneliness and Then There’s Loneliestness..

(Dedicated to my sister. I’m really sorry. Btw..dont sneeze!)

I never knew how lonely my sister would be after our mom passed.

I should have paid more attention to all the time and care she and her family were giving mom whereas I couldn’t and neither could my children.

Before we get our wires crossed up the very wrong way…mom loved us both and we both loved our mother.

Our mom spent almost all of my sister’s life trying to corral that child ..all the way up to the end of her teens, when she stayed gone the last time she ran away. I don’t remember how long she was gone, but eventually she came back… settled down a bit and tried going back to school in the summer. That didn’t last and the GED program for her diploma was out the window!

Oh what struggles and arguments our mom had with her!

Then came the day she got married…and months later she was pregnant. My mom and sister’s relationship changed gradually. They stopped misunderstanding each other. They talked. Laughed. Drank coffee and at long last…shopped together. The most ordinary of things. My sister started to rely on our mom for baby information. Pregnancy information. Marital stories were traded in the form of griping with one another over their mate’s perceived inadequacies and funny things they told.

Next our mom was helping my sister with her two children after her major surgery. And they got along. Our mom thought we never listened when she tried teaching us household cares…she saw herself reflected in my sister’s home. Our mom smiled. But she had to say things because she’s mom. Nit picking was her favorite thing I thought sometimes…lol.

My sister went on to divorce and marry again. And adopt in her heart a wild stepchild of her new husband’s. My sister just smiled I think. Well our mom was with her every step… through the good and tough and rough situations…. cause they usually lived pretty close to each others homes at times.

The last few years of our mom’s life was spent in a closeby area where my sister could get to her if needed. By this time my sister, like me, was pretty much unable to walk well because of our backs hips knees and feet giving up on us. My body declared the white flag first, then a few years later her body did the same. So taking care of our mom in her declining health state took everything my sister and her family had. It was kind of funny toward the last two years. I talked to both of them on the phone…and both complained about the other… how much the other must not care for them or they wouldn’t do such n such.

They both swore the son in law loved our mom more or was loved by our mom more or to that effect. Then the day came when our mom took her last breath and my sister and I were there as was the son in law.

I never realized how quiet….very quiet things were until recently. Reflection on those days that is.

And my sister has been really lonely since our mom passed. The Loneliestness I’ve ever realized. Mom can’t call her and argue and complain and she can’t argue back.

Something she’s done since she was little.

And it’s quiet now.

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Author is Robin.

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Did it, Finished, Done

The rain was not going to let up on Monday. Its dreary gloom didn’t do a thing for the contrariness of some of the grandchildren. The few business people who called me today I’m sure weren’t too happy either as they had been dealing with hurricane Florence. They all were a bit on the “no-nonsense-lets- get this-over” tone when first starting out in the calls. I don’t think I could blame them at all. I did give it my best effort to be humorous to lighten the situation, offering a “funny” here or there when appropriate. Patience is key. Both caller and the answerer.

Eventually the beautiful sun did show its warm face and chased away much of the darkish clouds that had been in overhang mode a good deal of the weekend and beyond. I did smile all day yesterday in spite of the drizzle of wet all over my area. Plus….and I don’t know who could resist this one….I was gifted not ONE tall coffee but TWO!!

Yes. Definitely. My day was on its way to being a great day.

So I say to you. Smile more. Humbleness is also a sign of maturity. And also opens your heart and mind to appreciating. That gives way to….happiness…not only in a coffee.

****As the evening is getting here, I’m ready for it. Finished. Done. Bedtime soon.

See you later in the week unless I find something else to talk about.

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My other link is

JW.ORG